How to eat a muffin while walking

It’s Friday. I’ve been working hard. Time for some fun.

I hardly ever eat muffins, but when I do I’m usually traveling by foot. I pass a good coffee shop on my morning walk from train to office. On the rare occasion I skipped breakfast at home, I’ll buy a muffin. With an aim at efficiency, I’ll eat it while walking.

The best way to do so is to first remove the paper muffin cup and throw it away. Then, eat the muffin bottom-up. Start with the “stump” and consume the part that “breaks free from the pan” last (let’s call that part the “crown”). Eating a muffin upside down helps keep it from falling apart. The stump is prone to crumbling and the firmer crown helps hold it together. It works!

The way I used to eat a muffin, and the way I see most others doing so, is top-down, crown first, stump last. The problem is, once you’ve eaten the exoskeleton-like crown, the stump is only held together by the paper muffin cup. Peel that away to eat the stump and you’re left with a mess. Muffin stumps have no integrity!  This doesn’t matter much while eating a muffin over a plate, but while walking, muffin integrity is, well, everything. On foot, a muffin that falls to pieces is a ruined breakfast.

So, that’s my tip of the week. To eat a muffin while walking, start with the stump and eat the crown last. It’s the best tasting part anyway!

UPDATE: See also this follow-up.

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